If only we knew this, perimenopause would have been different. 

More floor and core exercises? Really? I asked the mums who had wrangled kids and logistics to show up to the circuit class I was leading at the gym (think early 90’s gym kit - aka Olivia Newton John). They couldn’t stop talking about pelvic floors and restoring their cores.

Boring! I wanted to 'get physical' and didn’t understand their obsession. I do now. These women were trail-blazers. They knew their health was in the best interests of everyone.

This Women’s Health Week, I applaud those ladies at the YMCA that day that took a stand for their health.

Jean Hailes for Women's Health is a national not-for-profit organisation dedicated to improving women's health across Australia through every life stage. Their impact and need can be measured by their long waitlist. Services like these may be out of reach for many women so they provide a range of online resources too.

This week is Women’s Health Week and as pioneers in women’s health, it is no surprise they are making perimenopause and menopause matter.

They remind us “The taboos around talking about menopause and perimenopause (the lead-up to menopause) are finally crumbling but we’ve still got a long way to go before all women feel prepared for the changes that arrive at midlife”.

We are coming to grips with the downsides of silencing the menopause conversation and women’s bodies for too long.

The women in our community have tolerated symptoms unnecessarily, been mis-diagnosed, over-looked or sold mis-information.  

Workplaces incur losses of talent, productivity & contribution at a time when we need more women leaders. We need to recognise that in Australia, it will take 100 years for us to reach gender balance at the CEO level (not to mention fixing chasms at the feeder line-role level).

When Jean Hailes called me to contribute to the #menodiscussion, my first thought was – “I wish I was prepared” & then, I breathed and embraced 'progress not perfection' and said yes. Sharing real experiences and learning is how we create change and develop a whole new narrative.

My previously unexamined beliefs and bias worked against me big time. One of them was the internalised pressure to 'go natural' because I had delivered all my kids that way. The unhealthy need to 'stay strong' and push on because I was a leader, an eldest child and that’s what I did.

Hearing from other women is validating, reassuring and inspiring.

This is an extract from the full Jean Hailes article that shares the experiences of myself and four other women.

5 things we wish we knew

“I was pedantic about everything, and everything had to run like clockwork,” she says. “But as I learned, life doesn’t always work like clockwork.” Maria

“I didn’t listen to the conversation around MHT [menopausal hormone therapy]. I had this self-imposed pressure to do it naturally.” Melissa

“I felt shut down [by my doctor]. I felt I was whingeing… what I needed was someone to validate my experience and to explore my options.” Robyn

“Looking back now, I think I went through perimenopause but just didn’t recognise it. I wish I had also known that symptoms could last this long” Natalie

“We don’t make a big deal of it [menopause],” she says. “It just comes automatically.” Ntumba 

From letting go to opening up and recognising menopause as the natural right of passage that it is.

You can find the full article here “What I wish I'd known about… perimenopause and menopause.”

Reflecting on my #menolearning reminds me that I felt very stuck for a very long time. I slowly but surely shifted from feeling disempowered to founding a community to help other women become their own experts.

That is a story for next time. It’s a story full of drama.

In the meantime, if you are a midlife woman keen to “own your experience” by tapping into a community of like-hearted women and experts, consider joining our menopause community. You can find more information & a listening ear here 

Be healthy,

Melissa